You now you have too much horsepower when.
You now you have too much horsepower when:
1: The emissions test guy starts laughing, as soon as you pull onto the rollers.
2: You can`t drive your car in the rain.
3: your "significant other" is afreid too drive your car.
4: You spend moore on tires, than on food.
5: You look in a State police car, and see a picture of your car taped to the dash.
6: You trow your underware in the garbage, rather than the hamper.
7: You hade to go to the track to buy gas.
8: Your mechanic names the new wing of his shop after you.
9: Jaques Villenueve and Michel Schumacher wawe you bye.
10: You`re tempted to were your firesuite, just to drive to the office.
11: Red signal light shifts to green as you`re are approaching then skift back to red as you`re reciding.
12: You arrive somewhere before you left.
13: You get pulled over för doing 155 in a 35, but the cops will let you go if "they can look under the hood".
14: You remove a 2000 dollar sound system, to save 6 Lb. of weight.
15: You are not alloved to run the Silver State Challenge.
16: You get anonomus phonecalls, asking if you are interested to being in the Cannonball Run.
17: Your face looks like you are riding a NASA centrifuge, when you driving the car.
18; you need parachute braking.
19"significant other" won`t even ride in the car.
20: Threre is no possible way "to sneak out" of the nieghborhood at 6 am.
21 the pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon the garagedoors is opened. (pets and all the nieghbors...)
Senast redigerat av blacken (19 juli 2009)
Thorssa skrev:
blacken skrev:
Thorssa skrev:
Vem fan har skrivit den där? Sämsta engelskan jag varit med om!Tankade ner det ifrån en Amerikansk motorsite för några år sedan...
Hehe okej, var bara nyfiken
Skapligt pinsamt om det är en amerikan som har skrivit det
Tja plocka ut ett par inlägg från Garaget och ge dom till en svenska lärare, jag skulle tro att hon skulle tycka det var lika uselt som du tycker deras engelska är...
En avklarad, bara 20st kvar.
(Nummer 3 för den som undrar, nummer 19 när jag är sur. 
)
You *now* you cant spell for a shit since all your edukation wnt to boost your engine with more horsepowwwer * ,
Once and for all
Diminish the sub principle and leave it's toxic trace
Once and for all !
Ford Mustang Mach 1 "Trinity" (2003)
Rquired skrev:
Thorssa skrev:
blacken skrev:
Tankade ner det ifrån en Amerikansk motorsite för några år sedan...Hehe okej, var bara nyfiken
Tja plocka ut ett par inlägg från Garaget och ge dom till en svenska lärare, jag skulle tro att hon skulle tycka det var lika uselt som du tycker deras engelska är...
Det har du faktiskt rätt i
22. Before responding to a 911 call about a shooting the police phones you and asks if you are adjusting the ignition or have any other problems that might lead to the engine backfireing
23. You have caused the rental cops to make a special error code with your name when your exhaustnoice and vibrations causes burglar alarms to go of
24. The cops have a ladder in which the rate speeding vihecles. Speedin, Haulin' Ass, Stupid Fast, Organ donor, White lightnin', <you> fast!
25. Dust and other debris isn't the reason you have a airfilter.. You need it to avoid catching squirrels and seagulls.
25. You are banned from all touring dyno testing rigs.. Since you busted the last 5 you used..
26. The cops doesn't even bother chasing you anymore.. They use binoculars and just mail you the ticket(s)
27. You made the tractor puller turn green with envy. And he had 7 engines.. You only have one..
Så jag hade tråkigt...... 
BMW 525i E34 "Pingu" (1992)
BMW 325iT "Oxy" (1989)
här e den kompletta listan 
:
1. The emissions test guy starts laughing as soon as you pull onto the rollers.
2. You can't drive your car in the rain.
3. Your 'significant other' is afraid to drive your car.
4. You are afraid to drive your car.
5. You spend more on tires than on food.
6. You spend more on car insurance than on house payments.
7. You look in a state police car and see a picture of your car taped to the dash.
8. You throw your underwear in the garbage rather than the hamper.
9. You have to go to the track to buy gas.
10. Your mechanic names the new wing of his shop after you.
11. Jacques Villeneuve and Michael Schumacher wave you by.
12. You can make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
13. You're tempted to wear your fire suit just to drive to the office.
14. Red signal lights shift to green as you're approaching then shift back to red as you're receding.
15. You arrive somewhere before you left.
16. You get pulled over for doing 155 in a 35 but the cops will let you go if "they can look under the hood."
17. You remove the $2000 stereo system to save 6 lb. of weight.
18. You are not allowed to run in the Silver State Challenge.
19. You get an anonymous phone call asking if you are interested in being in the Cannonball Run.
20. Your face looks like you are riding a NASA centrifuge when you drive the car.
22. You need parachute braking.
23. Your 'significant other' won't even ride in the car.
24. There is no possible way to "sneak out" of your neighborhood at 6 am.
25. Your pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon as the garage door is opened. (Pets, and all the neighbors...)
26. Family photos throughout the house are replaced with life-sized posters of your car.
27. Fuel is delivered to your home: in 55 gallon drums!
28. You carry earplugs in your car.(doesn't everybody???)
29. The only spot on the car which receives any regular cleaning is the windshield. (what else is there to clean???)
30. You find out that side mirrors don't hold up at speeds exceeding 145 mph.
31. Young children cling to their mommies in fear when you round the corner.
32. Birds fall out of their nests from the rumble of your 5" dual exhaust.
33. All the major Tire makers are sending you free slicks in hopes of endorsment deal.
34. The UPS guy took to taking Steroids so he could keep up with your shipments.
35. The Fed Ex guy had a nervous breakdown.
36. All the wildlife within a 800ft radius around your house got the HELLOUT.
37. The nearest Geological Seismic Surveying Station Operator knows your address by heart.
38. A booming voice greets potential passengers with, "That's right ....you paid for the whole seat but you'll only need the EDGE.
39. The earth slows in rotation when you hook up on your new slicks and head east.
40. You have to screw your slicks to the wheels.
41. Your exhaust pipes are larger in diameter than your driveline.
42. Your fuel pump flows enough to water a golf course.
43. Your compression's high enough you could run diesel fuel.
44. The sparks from your wheelie bars start grass fires on the side of the road.
45. Your engine idles at 2800 rpm.
46. You measure the fuel you use in "gallons per mile."
Moparboy440 skrev:
här e den kompletta listan
1. The emissions test guy starts laughing as soon as you pull onto the rollers.
2. You can't drive your car in the rain.
3. Your 'significant other' is afraid to drive your car.
4. You are afraid to drive your car.
5. You spend more on tires than on food.
6. You spend more on car insurance than on house payments.
7. You look in a state police car and see a picture of your car taped to the dash.
8. You throw your underwear in the garbage rather than the hamper.
9. You have to go to the track to buy gas.
10. Your mechanic names the new wing of his shop after you.
11. Jacques Villeneuve and Michael Schumacher wave you by.
12. You can make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
13. You're tempted to wear your fire suit just to drive to the office.
14. Red signal lights shift to green as you're approaching then shift back to red as you're receding.
15. You arrive somewhere before you left.
16. You get pulled over for doing 155 in a 35 but the cops will let you go if "they can look under the hood."
17. You remove the $2000 stereo system to save 6 lb. of weight.
18. You are not allowed to run in the Silver State Challenge.
19. You get an anonymous phone call asking if you are interested in being in the Cannonball Run.
20. Your face looks like you are riding a NASA centrifuge when you drive the car.
22. You need parachute braking.
23. Your 'significant other' won't even ride in the car.
24. There is no possible way to "sneak out" of your neighborhood at 6 am.
25. Your pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon as the garage door is opened. (Pets, and all the neighbors...)
26. Family photos throughout the house are replaced with life-sized posters of your car.
27. Fuel is delivered to your home: in 55 gallon drums!
28. You carry earplugs in your car.(doesn't everybody???)
29. The only spot on the car which receives any regular cleaning is the windshield. (what else is there to clean???)
30. You find out that side mirrors don't hold up at speeds exceeding 145 mph.
31. Young children cling to their mommies in fear when you round the corner.
32. Birds fall out of their nests from the rumble of your 5" dual exhaust.
33. All the major Tire makers are sending you free slicks in hopes of endorsment deal.
34. The UPS guy took to taking Steroids so he could keep up with your shipments.
35. The Fed Ex guy had a nervous breakdown.
36. All the wildlife within a 800ft radius around your house got the HELLOUT.
37. The nearest Geological Seismic Surveying Station Operator knows your address by heart.
38. A booming voice greets potential passengers with, "That's right ....you paid for the whole seat but you'll only need the EDGE.
39. The earth slows in rotation when you hook up on your new slicks and head east.
40. You have to screw your slicks to the wheels.
41. Your exhaust pipes are larger in diameter than your driveline.
42. Your fuel pump flows enough to water a golf course.
43. Your compression's high enough you could run diesel fuel.
44. The sparks from your wheelie bars start grass fires on the side of the road.
45. Your engine idles at 2800 rpm.
46. You measure the fuel you use in "gallons per mile."
Hmmm. Det låter som han som skrev det, beskrev Volvon min ..
fortsätter på samma tema :
YOU MIGHT BE A RACER IF ...
* You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
* You take your helmet along when you go to buy new eyeglasses or check out cars.
* You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth and the wear bars are showing.
* When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
* Your email address refers to your race car rather than to you.
* You've paid $4.00 a gallon for gas without complaining.
* You bought a race car before buying a house.
* You bought a race car before buying furniture for the new house.
* You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture!
* The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of importance):
1) 8 car climate controlled garage with an attached shop.
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motor home, a crew cab dually, a 28' enclosed trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Deaf neighbors.
6) Some sort of house with a working toilet & shower on the property - or - hookups for the motor home.
* You sit in your race car in a dark garage and make car noises and shift and practice your heel and toe, while waiting for your motor to get back from the machine shop.
* You have enough spare parts to build another car.
* More than one racer supply store recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
* You think the last line of the Star Spangled banner is: "Racers start your engines!"
* People know you by your class, car number, and car color.
* You astound the clerk at Sears by bringing in a snapped breaker bar every other week or so.
* Your family brings the couch into the garage to spend time with you.
* A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Vegetable or corn."
* You enjoy driving in the rain on the way to work.
* You always want to change something on your street car to make it handle better.
* You've tried to convince your wife you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her station wagon.
* You save broken car parts as "momentous".
* You've found your lawnmower runs pretty good on 108 octane gas (but doesn't particularly care for alcohol).
* The local police and state highway patrol have a picture of your car taped to their dashboard.
* Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have time slips.
* You quote your street tire wear life in weeks rather than miles.
* After you tell your wife where you'd like to go on vacation she answers: "Why...is there a race there?"
* You know at least three 1-800 numbers to aftermarket parts houses by heart.
* You are on a first-name basis with owners of every local speed shop.
* You want to take apart and rebuild things, even though they are not broken.
* You have the monetary equivalent of a lunar rocket invested in it, but your car still won't cut a good light or run the number.
* You own a vehicle that has at least 500 horsepower more than when it came out of Detroit.
* You look for hi-po cars in the movies and try to guess what engine size, tire size, and whether or not it has nitrous in it.
* You are the type of person who goes postal when you have to sit in a traffic jam for more than five minutes, yet you can spend five hours in the staging lanes.
* Every stoplight becomes a practice tree to test your ability to tree the guy in the other lane's eyes out.
* You wash your car like it was your firstborn child, you tend to its needs like it was your own body, you protect it like it's your family, then you drive it like you stole it.
* You understand racing is a way of life, not just a means of transportation.
Brains skrev:
28. When Chuck Norris is driving your car.
Nej jag kommer aldrig tröttna på alla Chuck Norris skämt.
Volvo XC 70 D5 AWD "My Ocean Race" (2005)
Volvo 760 2,4 td GLE "Grey-ko" (1989)
Moparboy440 skrev:
...
* You wash your car like it was your firstborn child, you tend to its needs like it was your own body, you protect it like it's your family, then you drive it like you stole it.
...
Haha
/William Shakespeare, Hamlet.
A wise man once told me that death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back.
Russel Crowe, Gladiator.
